English movie director Duncan Jones went viral last week for a tweet that had some applauding and others shaking their heads. In the tweet, Jones aired some feelings about having two kids under the age of three. Spoiler alert: They’re not overly positive.

While many Twitter users commiserated, others criticized, saying he was missing the point of parenthood.

It’s good to be honest about the struggles that come with raising kids. But in today’s self-absorbed culture, we can miss the point of parenthood, and loving relationships in general.